hello 2010!

Wellington dah New Year. haha nak jugakkk cakap. tapi Malaysia belum. kejap lagi. in few hours. takde pape perasaan la weh nak New Year. cuma excited nak tulis kat dalam diary baru kale pink aje. dan azam aku untuk diary 2010 ini, aku nak istiqamah dalam menulis (haha) dan aku nak simpan baik2 di tempat persembunyian supaya tidak dijumpai oleh adik2 lalu dibaca. tsk. dah cukup collection diary aku menjadi bahan bacaan bersama2 komik Anak Sateria, Slamdunk, Dragon Ball sume. dah cukup dijadikan bahan ketawa. selepas ini tidak lagi! huuuuu

jadi, selepas muhasabah diri, kita renungkan kegagalan tahun 2009:
- tak dapat jadi kurus kering.
- tak sampai Aussie lagi.
- tak cukup kumpul duit, tak kaye.
- tak matang lagi. masih kebudak2an.

dan sedikit kejayaan tahun 2009:
- tidak segemuk 2008.
- result lebih banyak A dari B. (poyo)
- dapat bertahan dalam long distance relationship yang menguji kesabaranku.
- meninggalkan Welly dengan penuh kenangan manis.

jadi azam 2010 adalah kesinambungan kepada kegagalan 2009. mungkin akan tambah sikit2 la tapi rahsia. haha gedikss.

so, hello to u 2010! my prediction for this year is going to be a challenging one, but it's gonna be full of laughter and sweet memories. i'm gonna make this year a memorable one, as my final year as a student! yeahhhh!

tapi kita start new year's resolution dengan merajinkan diri untuk packingggggg for IPBA this 5th Jan. malassss weyh.

24.

i just went through hell for 24 hours, or maybe more.

i dont know if i said sth hurtful (clearly i did), that he keeps silent for 24 hours, or maybe more.

i lost count of how many phone calls i did, i left few sorry texts, one picture msg, n he gave me only one, one text msg, before finally answering my call.

fuhh.

now i know that guys also have this kind of scary attitude.

or, now i know that this particular guy, have this particular kind of attitude, this silent treatment, and it's scary.

it's scary, even with the intention to avoid fights.

to avoid fights? i prefer to talk, and communicate, rather than keep quiet to solve a problem.

but maybe my communication style would make things worse, that i'll try to win, not tolerate.

so i try to tolerate, and say sorry. and everything's back to normal. or at least, i feel normal again.

normal, as in i dont hv this butterflies in the stomach, that i want to throw up, and couldnt eat a thing.

lepastu timbang berat kat BP Mall, turun 2kg jadi 40++ je uollsss. hahaha. sebab tak makan, nak shopping tak larat, muka pucat adik2 ajak makan tak nak, tapi still kena gelak2 untuk sembunyikan daripada mak. (hey ryhmes!) but then i was forced to eat sausage, ikan keli, jambu, n bubble tea. but still refused to eat rice. nak muntah wey.

gila.

but i learn my lesson. and i made a promise. not just another promise. this one's an achievable one. haha. although it's kinda ridiculous but it's achievable. ye la takkan nak janji palsu je kan. =p

i'll try my best.

to be more careful with him, and his feelings. to avoid meeting up with this 'scary' him again. you, 'scary' him, pls dont show up again okay. this first meeting is already enough for me.

i'll try my best.

bcoz i know, i'm not ready for a breakup. not yet.

okay, off to Maghrib prayer.

minta kepada Allah untuk ketenangan hati, dijauhi sifat2 mazmumah, dipermudahkan segala urusan, dan dipertemukan dengan jodoh yang terbaik. InsyaAllah.

Aminnn. =)

when sorry seems to be the hardest word.

hari ini penat. penat bermasak2 banyak2 mama nak buat sedekah sikit hantar kat masjid. pastu penat bergaduh pulak dgn orang itu. serius penat weh.

bila adik aku tanya kenapa bergaduh? aku serius tak ingat sebab apa gaduh. mula2 macam biasa je cakap fon hehe hihi huhu hehe hihi tiba2 aku jadi emo cakap bukan2 aku pun tak tahu kenapa lepastu ternangis pulak tu. terus keadaan menjadi tegang n i hung up. lepas tu masing2 buat bodoh. masa fasa buat bodoh ni adalah fasa paling tak tahan sekali. sekarang pun tengah fasa buat bodoh lah. memang terasa bodoh lah. rasa nak call, nak text, tapi tahan diri sebab ego. tapi sebenarnya nak cakap, nak minta maaf kat dia dan jernihkan keadaan tapi tak tahu lah. tak tahu dia nak angkat ke tak. tadi masa merepek2 aku macam ada termintak clash lagi. TERmintak ok. huuuu. entah lah. tak tahu lah apa akan jadi lepas ni. tiba2 rasa pening kepala loya2 tak selera makan (ehhh?) lepastu pergi mandi. lepas mandi pakai tshirt 'single and ready to mingle' adik tanya eh dah single ke? apsal la menusuk sangat statement tu sampai rasa nak menangis?

lepas ni, kalau tiba2 status i bertukar single, jangan nak tanya2 eh. nanti i nangis.

haha. (gelak fake)

sekian terima kasih. n to u if u happen to read this, i'm sorry.

unprivate.

i dont know if the word 'unprivate' exists or not.



quick updates!!

- I MISS WELLINGTON!!!!! YES I DO!!!! I REALLLLYYYYY DO!!!! DEYM.

- i dont hv the appetite to eat. like when i was in Welly, i always said that i want to eat kfc, i want to eat this, i want to eat that. but when i'm here, i dont eat what i want to eat. i just eat what's there to eat. good for me, tho.

- i curled my hair woohoo. i took (read: camwhored) some pictures of me n my new hair but too lazy to transfer and upload. later, maybe.

- i cant wait to start the final sem in IPBA. haha

- i'm broke.

- i use maxis postpaid. my number is 0147736771. take note ya. n text me ur number too!

- i am bored to death.

- i am busy attending jemputan kahwin. lepastu rasa macam nak kahwin tapi tiada calon. tsk

- 'kawan' yang i tidak mahu ada apa2 kaitan lagi keep texting me everyday. sometimes i do reply but sometimes i just ignore. i have no idea.

- i'm not yet get the opportunity to see him.

- takara dah 3 hari tak balik rumah. aku dah macam orang gila asik panggil dia setiap 1 jam. takara cepat balik!!

- right now, i'm listening to mama's voice membebel dapur bersepah.



okay lah, later'll update with picturesssss k. bye!

GOODBYE!

scorpio.

pictures of me on my birthday this year.
a surprise from F n N (n a few others) at the uni on 30th October, my actual birthday is on the 31st (HALLOWEEN yaw) =p
and yes, this is the third entry from me today. bear with me coz i might not blog for a while. hihi
i am 22 years and a month old now. how i wish i'm still 17!

the super delicious cookies n cream ice cream cake from Wendy's

sugar overdose.

which one is sweeter? me or the triple chocolate brownies? wahaha


i am neither a sweet tooth, nor a sweet talker.
and that dessert costs me n F $10.90, at Strawberry Fare.
mahal gila! nasib baik dah nak balik so nak merasa la gak dessert di sini.
tapi lepas makan, pening sekejap, sebab sugar overdose kot.

so my advice to u,

kurangkan gula dalam makanan, tambahkan manis dalam senyuman! =))